Freedom!

Curiously - or not, because we are probably in the eye of the storm - I feel quite calm and free.   A lot of this is due to the decision to abandon the market stall - I got to 7 cons and only 1 pro - so I decided it must be rather like the decision to leave ChristChurch - when there were 7 objections to a matter... it sounds rather biblical... it was time to go.   I can't remember what the pros were with CC - nice congregation? proximity to house?  The pro with the market was small amounts of cash every week - but the small was too small to exchange the whole of the weekend for.

Went out to a party at Alex's last night.   I am noticing a weariness with social engagements recently, I had to drag myself out - actually Alex offered me £20 to do some starters for him... It was a nice party, but I felt unengaged, lost my desire to charm or "sparkle" can't be arsed, there were nice people there, but maybe I was tired, or is it just that despite having apparently gone native, there are bits of me that find reading the book section of the Guardian a more stimulating activity.  

Simon has sent me a book by Von Hugel as a pdf. and I am hoping to read it slowly.... I like the sound of his ideas, it's always good to feel one's weird theology has company.  VH was a Catholic - so it will be interesting to see how far I agree with him, ever since I converted to the CoE years ago my explanation for my position has been that I am "culturally Catholic and theologically Protestant". I certainly don't have a trace of ultramontaneism in my make-up.   If there is a word to describe someone who disrespects the office of Pope it would be me (the word Protestant?).