This time there were some weird ones, but all the US ones seemed to be linked with the military - I skipped through those fairly quickly. I found an interesting one called American Idle - which I liked, someone clearly quite right wing but interesting as well. I would have liked to follow it - but didn't seem to have the capacity. There was a wargame one with photos of toy soldiers, and just a swathe of stuff that makes one feel one's world view is totally out of sync with everyone else. I keep thinking there must be someone of a vaguely similar outlook out there. Oh well, at least there weren't any more adorable families.
I really should be dealing with the financial issues - but I'm just too tired. I think I can give myself a bit of a break.
Reading while dead
Tuesday, 31 May 2011
Grand Unifying Theory
You know, this is an issue that has been bugging me for some time.... I know so little about particle physics and so on, that I hardly dare express myself on the topic. However, last night, watching the Adam Curtis programme about the development of the internet and the ideology behind it, I found myself remembering an unfinished discussion with J and since I can't have it with him, I will try to have it here - who knows, I might even get a comment!
J said "Science teaches us to look for a single theory which explains everything." (Once again, I paraphrase and may be wrong). My contrarian gene immediately wanted to say "but why should there be a single theory which explains everything?" why shouldn't there be a number of theories which interact to explain different things?.
I think this is arguably some kind of fashionable post-modern approach, in that it attacks the "absolute truth" idea, and proceeds from human experience, but it occurs to me that the reason that science seeks a unifying theory may be because science after all developed in tandem with theology - and theology uses (ultimately) God to explain everything - and theology searches for God in everything - whereas science as an intellectual practice - cannot apply God, but seeks to find something else that explains everything. So far, so good. Nothing can shake a believer from a theocentric explanation, and God can usually explain stuff, in the sense that we all know He moves in a mysterious way etc. But why should there be an over-arching scientific theory? I think I read somewhere that there are parts of the universe where gravity does not apply. If this is true, it seems to me that there are likely to be circumstances where any theory may not apply.
I wish I knew if it was true though, where would gravity not apply? Inside an electron? Dunno.
I suppose rather than extrapolating from a "god-based" theory - I am thinking of a theory more based on human behaviour: humans are diverse and do not behave the same way in every situation - and this seems a perfectly acceptable possibility about scientific laws.... and thus if the GUT was to be made based on various laws/theories (gravity, thermodynamics, evolution, relativity - to name a few) some of which did not always behave consistently.... well, arguably it makes it harder to find the data to get to that theory, or maybe it just doesn't exist, or like whatever happened before the Big Bang is only part of our imagination - and has no reality. Of course - apparently nothing happened before Big Bang since time and space did not exist then (apparently) - but I was brought up on ex nihilo nihil fit and I find it impossible (like most people) to believe that things just start without any cause, any prior notice or begin without any cause.
What was interesting on "Watched over by Machines of Incredible Grace" (WOMIG) was the idea that seemed to be inherent in the "Limits to Growth" arguments that Nature maintained some kind of status quo. Of course the reality is very different, the constant geological upheavals and weather changes, and one predator wiping out another species has been going for ever - there is no state to which we can revert as a "norm". It would be nice to keep things in an equilibrium - but not within our power, and to maintain an environmental/economic equilibrium is to condemn developing countries to perpetual suffering and to never develop. While politically unsavoury, this is clearly an easier object to achieve (or was 50 years ago) than persuading citizens of developed countries to give up their lifestyles in favour of helping 3rd world countries raise their standards of living.
Something that hadn't occurred to me before was that traditionally we had the idea that humanity was a "special creation" - this idea persisted beyond the decline in widespread religious belief in Europe - but by the 60s-70s we began to be seen as one species amongst many and our specialness has declined. With that I suppose has come the rise of "animal rights" - and a lot of other relativistic stuff... I daresay the idea of humans as special will continue to decline in the "west" - it is an idea that's closely linked to a belief in God.
But this is just a collection of ideas nudged by WOMIG - and it doesn't answer the question "Does there have to be a grand unifying theory"? And I can't get anywhere with it. I should read more widely, but most sciencey books (pace Jared Diamond) are really dull and difficult to read - especially to a non-specialist.
As for my current reading..... well, that's another story.
J said "Science teaches us to look for a single theory which explains everything." (Once again, I paraphrase and may be wrong). My contrarian gene immediately wanted to say "but why should there be a single theory which explains everything?" why shouldn't there be a number of theories which interact to explain different things?.
I think this is arguably some kind of fashionable post-modern approach, in that it attacks the "absolute truth" idea, and proceeds from human experience, but it occurs to me that the reason that science seeks a unifying theory may be because science after all developed in tandem with theology - and theology uses (ultimately) God to explain everything - and theology searches for God in everything - whereas science as an intellectual practice - cannot apply God, but seeks to find something else that explains everything. So far, so good. Nothing can shake a believer from a theocentric explanation, and God can usually explain stuff, in the sense that we all know He moves in a mysterious way etc. But why should there be an over-arching scientific theory? I think I read somewhere that there are parts of the universe where gravity does not apply. If this is true, it seems to me that there are likely to be circumstances where any theory may not apply.
I wish I knew if it was true though, where would gravity not apply? Inside an electron? Dunno.
I suppose rather than extrapolating from a "god-based" theory - I am thinking of a theory more based on human behaviour: humans are diverse and do not behave the same way in every situation - and this seems a perfectly acceptable possibility about scientific laws.... and thus if the GUT was to be made based on various laws/theories (gravity, thermodynamics, evolution, relativity - to name a few) some of which did not always behave consistently.... well, arguably it makes it harder to find the data to get to that theory, or maybe it just doesn't exist, or like whatever happened before the Big Bang is only part of our imagination - and has no reality. Of course - apparently nothing happened before Big Bang since time and space did not exist then (apparently) - but I was brought up on ex nihilo nihil fit and I find it impossible (like most people) to believe that things just start without any cause, any prior notice or begin without any cause.
What was interesting on "Watched over by Machines of Incredible Grace" (WOMIG) was the idea that seemed to be inherent in the "Limits to Growth" arguments that Nature maintained some kind of status quo. Of course the reality is very different, the constant geological upheavals and weather changes, and one predator wiping out another species has been going for ever - there is no state to which we can revert as a "norm". It would be nice to keep things in an equilibrium - but not within our power, and to maintain an environmental/economic equilibrium is to condemn developing countries to perpetual suffering and to never develop. While politically unsavoury, this is clearly an easier object to achieve (or was 50 years ago) than persuading citizens of developed countries to give up their lifestyles in favour of helping 3rd world countries raise their standards of living.
Something that hadn't occurred to me before was that traditionally we had the idea that humanity was a "special creation" - this idea persisted beyond the decline in widespread religious belief in Europe - but by the 60s-70s we began to be seen as one species amongst many and our specialness has declined. With that I suppose has come the rise of "animal rights" - and a lot of other relativistic stuff... I daresay the idea of humans as special will continue to decline in the "west" - it is an idea that's closely linked to a belief in God.
But this is just a collection of ideas nudged by WOMIG - and it doesn't answer the question "Does there have to be a grand unifying theory"? And I can't get anywhere with it. I should read more widely, but most sciencey books (pace Jared Diamond) are really dull and difficult to read - especially to a non-specialist.
As for my current reading..... well, that's another story.
Monday, 30 May 2011
Dosh
The overwhelming problem of money hangs over me, and we are slowly getting away from our situation, but there is still much to be done. It does make me react like a rabbit in the headlights - but the plan is today to re-submit our tax return, work out the budget and do some serious work on it tomorrow.
It is a Bank Holiday today - and I am looking forward to a real rest, since I think I have worked pretty hard. Sam and I are doing some pro bono work for the Arts Festival... and I am spending my Saturdays baking and Sundays flogging food. The first week of the "Bread of Heaven" stall was rather disappointing, £30 profit, before I accounted for the cost of ingredients. But this week I just prayed that I would make £100 - and we did! Exactly £100 after the cost of the stall. That was so fantastic, and I felt that perhaps this was the activity God was favouring. I was asked to do another stall at Rebecca Sunshine's family camp weekend, and a woman took my card and said she was thinking of starting a bakery in Broadstairs. So who knows what will happen?
Meanwhile, no work on Conscience this week - just as it was going so well.... it's a great displacement activity, but I reall;y do have to deal with financial issues. Just think how great I will feel when it's sorted. I could aim to do it by Wednesday evening - so that I can clear the decks for Viv's visit. She and her friend Kate are coming to visit - and are paying me to cook dinner for us on Thursday - rather than going out! She's requested a lamb tagine... and I'll do some Moroccan salads, couscous, and some puddings... when I'm not worrying about how to ensure that some debts get paid.
Other excitement, a new tap in the bathroom - fitted by our neighbour Julian for a reasonable fee... he also re-set some of the tiles, dealt with a damp problem and tried to sort out the intermittent fault with the loo - but didn't, I don't think anyone can, it';s something to do with water pressure I suspect. So we wil have to live with the intermittent door banging noises...
It is a Bank Holiday today - and I am looking forward to a real rest, since I think I have worked pretty hard. Sam and I are doing some pro bono work for the Arts Festival... and I am spending my Saturdays baking and Sundays flogging food. The first week of the "Bread of Heaven" stall was rather disappointing, £30 profit, before I accounted for the cost of ingredients. But this week I just prayed that I would make £100 - and we did! Exactly £100 after the cost of the stall. That was so fantastic, and I felt that perhaps this was the activity God was favouring. I was asked to do another stall at Rebecca Sunshine's family camp weekend, and a woman took my card and said she was thinking of starting a bakery in Broadstairs. So who knows what will happen?
Meanwhile, no work on Conscience this week - just as it was going so well.... it's a great displacement activity, but I reall;y do have to deal with financial issues. Just think how great I will feel when it's sorted. I could aim to do it by Wednesday evening - so that I can clear the decks for Viv's visit. She and her friend Kate are coming to visit - and are paying me to cook dinner for us on Thursday - rather than going out! She's requested a lamb tagine... and I'll do some Moroccan salads, couscous, and some puddings... when I'm not worrying about how to ensure that some debts get paid.
Other excitement, a new tap in the bathroom - fitted by our neighbour Julian for a reasonable fee... he also re-set some of the tiles, dealt with a damp problem and tried to sort out the intermittent fault with the loo - but didn't, I don't think anyone can, it';s something to do with water pressure I suspect. So we wil have to live with the intermittent door banging noises...
Monday, 23 May 2011
The Literary Market
... is alas not yet ready for the slightness of the story of The Formative Year. For a first novel one needs a hook of some kind. So writes the latest rejecting agent. It was a very nice email, very complimentary, and the kind that makes one want to keep trying - but can I re-write my pitch to make it more 'hooky' or shall I just forget it. Another thought is that Conscience has a much better pitch than TFY. So should I blaze ahead with that, and try and get agent/publisher to accept TFY as my second novel - i.e. retire from the world of pitching for a bit? C is going "quite well" i.e. I have now got to about 30,000 words, he's made his first proposal, and when I write it is all coming out nice and smoothly.
Latest agent (Gaby Banks of Shiel Land) described my writing as "smooth" I believe this is a good thing - but I don't quite like it - someone else has described it thus - so it's obviously a term in use. What's wrong with being smooth? I don't know, it suggests a faintly boring/predictable nature. Maybe it just means grammatical or lacking any unpleasant syntactical surprises? - and she liked the characters too. That was reassuring, I feel I concentrate too much on the central character - and no complaints about the 1st person/3rd person shifts either.
Other markets - well, there was the Margate Bazaar - I made £30 - which is about £2 per hour for the work involved. That said, there wasn't a great turnout - although the weather was good : no banana buns, no croissants. Maybe banana bread - maybe fruit cake. Next week more savoury stuff - quiche, flaounes, sausage rolls? Pasties? Pasty bolognese? That could be popular. Better have a look at some books. Need something to draw the eye to the stall. Foccacia not a great seller. But I might make some tomato foccacia because that, with a glass of white wine, makes a good lunch while one's on the stall. I'll take my own bottle next week - a glass from the pub is only a quid less than a bottle (actually, I got some really good cheap Soave for £3.29 the other day).
Needless to say, having managed to lose 4kgs in the last 2 weeks, this past weekend has not been great for dieting, especially as we went out to dinner at Anette & Neville's last night - and then to Alex's for drinks and snacks on Sunday. Generally, we had an amazingly sociable and hardworking weekend. I have decided to start having Sunday night soirees, preferably in the garden, over the summer - we'll try and have 3, June - July and August, but we must also arrange the next Midsummer Picnic.
Latest agent (Gaby Banks of Shiel Land) described my writing as "smooth" I believe this is a good thing - but I don't quite like it - someone else has described it thus - so it's obviously a term in use. What's wrong with being smooth? I don't know, it suggests a faintly boring/predictable nature. Maybe it just means grammatical or lacking any unpleasant syntactical surprises? - and she liked the characters too. That was reassuring, I feel I concentrate too much on the central character - and no complaints about the 1st person/3rd person shifts either.
Other markets - well, there was the Margate Bazaar - I made £30 - which is about £2 per hour for the work involved. That said, there wasn't a great turnout - although the weather was good : no banana buns, no croissants. Maybe banana bread - maybe fruit cake. Next week more savoury stuff - quiche, flaounes, sausage rolls? Pasties? Pasty bolognese? That could be popular. Better have a look at some books. Need something to draw the eye to the stall. Foccacia not a great seller. But I might make some tomato foccacia because that, with a glass of white wine, makes a good lunch while one's on the stall. I'll take my own bottle next week - a glass from the pub is only a quid less than a bottle (actually, I got some really good cheap Soave for £3.29 the other day).
Needless to say, having managed to lose 4kgs in the last 2 weeks, this past weekend has not been great for dieting, especially as we went out to dinner at Anette & Neville's last night - and then to Alex's for drinks and snacks on Sunday. Generally, we had an amazingly sociable and hardworking weekend. I have decided to start having Sunday night soirees, preferably in the garden, over the summer - we'll try and have 3, June - July and August, but we must also arrange the next Midsummer Picnic.
Friday, 20 May 2011
Wingnut Dishwashers Union?
For some strange reason when I began to type the title for this entry the above phrase appeared in the box - I suspect it's the name of one of the bands dear to the boys. It seemed better than the title I had thought of - especially as the Dishwashers' Union is active in the kitchen as I write - all 3 of them.
Why am I writing? Because I can - just - after a couple of glasses of wine. I am amazed, I think I actually missed Mark today...
The next few weekends are going to be odd. In a mad attempt to earn some money I have been talked into getting a market stall in Margate to sell baked goods - I'm calling it Bread of Heaven! The cheek of it - but maybe someone will notice the Christian reference - and maybe someone will take my card...
Had a lovely surprise today - an unexpected cheque for £150 and £50 cash from Mark's mother and M has an odd "cash in hand" job next week - so we can start hoarding money and putting it into a bank asap. I have described the current financial situation as fighting dragons while anvils rain on me.... but today I was seized by accidia - I wonder why it stopped being one of the 7 Deadly Sins? - and did virtually nothing, until I forced myself to go out. I did do somethings, but somehow when the internet isn't working properly it is distracting and ennervating, and I feel too irritable to cope with stuff.
Feel convinced there is some hideous virus in the imputer - but apparently there has been a lot of trouble recently with broadband and mobile phones, and everyone is getting jumpy about how dependent we are on them. True - but I could go back to putting letters in envelopes and looking things up in books again if necessary. I could even make phone calls.
Why am I writing? Because I can - just - after a couple of glasses of wine. I am amazed, I think I actually missed Mark today...
The next few weekends are going to be odd. In a mad attempt to earn some money I have been talked into getting a market stall in Margate to sell baked goods - I'm calling it Bread of Heaven! The cheek of it - but maybe someone will notice the Christian reference - and maybe someone will take my card...
Had a lovely surprise today - an unexpected cheque for £150 and £50 cash from Mark's mother and M has an odd "cash in hand" job next week - so we can start hoarding money and putting it into a bank asap. I have described the current financial situation as fighting dragons while anvils rain on me.... but today I was seized by accidia - I wonder why it stopped being one of the 7 Deadly Sins? - and did virtually nothing, until I forced myself to go out. I did do somethings, but somehow when the internet isn't working properly it is distracting and ennervating, and I feel too irritable to cope with stuff.
Feel convinced there is some hideous virus in the imputer - but apparently there has been a lot of trouble recently with broadband and mobile phones, and everyone is getting jumpy about how dependent we are on them. True - but I could go back to putting letters in envelopes and looking things up in books again if necessary. I could even make phone calls.
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Snoozy schlepper
After a fantastic evening of reading group (this is not the monthly book group but 4 of us who meet to discuss and share books we like... ) I tried to work this morning - didn't get far, took M to station, and went to buy provisions.
Came home shattered and ravenous and ate tons of pistachios and crab sticks. Then I lay down and went to sleep! I awoke at 5.00pm to find Finn in my bedroom grumbling because he'd been ringing the doorbell for half an hour (allegedly) and had had to climb over the wall and come in through the back door - which was open as usual.
I politely pointed out that he was meant to have keys with him. Ironic this, because when I got home at 1.30 last night the door was locked and Finn was the one who came down to let me in. I heard his voice saying "mum?" nervously from within. It was extremely wet - it must have rained for that 10 minutes when I walked home, because it had made no difference to the pond level.
This really isn't very interesting is it? So I have to say, why am I writing it when I could be reading "The Blue Flower" by Penelope Fitzgerald? I dunno, because I haven't done very much today - this is because I did a lot yesterday - and so today has been a bit of a slump.
I woke from the afternoon slumber feeling extremely depressed, but it wore off after a cup of tea and an episode of the Simpsons with the boys.
Someone hinted at fostering as a financial solution - a couple of thousand a month would mean we could pay off our debts in a few years. And do all sorts of things around the house, and go on holidays. But would I be able to cope? And what would happen to the firm of HamlynHolmans.... ?
Came home shattered and ravenous and ate tons of pistachios and crab sticks. Then I lay down and went to sleep! I awoke at 5.00pm to find Finn in my bedroom grumbling because he'd been ringing the doorbell for half an hour (allegedly) and had had to climb over the wall and come in through the back door - which was open as usual.
I politely pointed out that he was meant to have keys with him. Ironic this, because when I got home at 1.30 last night the door was locked and Finn was the one who came down to let me in. I heard his voice saying "mum?" nervously from within. It was extremely wet - it must have rained for that 10 minutes when I walked home, because it had made no difference to the pond level.
This really isn't very interesting is it? So I have to say, why am I writing it when I could be reading "The Blue Flower" by Penelope Fitzgerald? I dunno, because I haven't done very much today - this is because I did a lot yesterday - and so today has been a bit of a slump.
I woke from the afternoon slumber feeling extremely depressed, but it wore off after a cup of tea and an episode of the Simpsons with the boys.
Someone hinted at fostering as a financial solution - a couple of thousand a month would mean we could pay off our debts in a few years. And do all sorts of things around the house, and go on holidays. But would I be able to cope? And what would happen to the firm of HamlynHolmans.... ?
Tuesday, 17 May 2011
Schleppin' and a'schmoozin'
Yes, today I lived up to my blogname. Sam and I went to Margate - we found that the Lifeboat doesn't actually open at 12.00 although it says it does. We mooched about a bit, fatally went to the bookshop and I bought a book. The marvellous thing about it is because it's a charity shop the books are really sensibly priced. I could have bought more, but I thought guiltily about the tottering towers of books beside my bed, inside the bedside cupboard and along the mantelpiece and, last but not least, on the unread bookshelf.
Then we attempted to schmooze the owner of the Lifeboat who of course used to be head of Retail Marketing at BP. But we got some work from him, because halfway through the conversation it occurred that we didn't have to stick to marketing - we could take on any projects that small businesses didn't have time for. So we said this vaguely, and he said he was looking for a property because he wanted to expand and if we could find him one.... so we have a job!
We then had lunch - nice little guinea fowl pie - but their food is regrettably veg-free so not very suitable for me. I also drank some medium cider and it was still disgusting. I fear I only like sweet cider, that is so babyish, and what I really like is Norman/Breton cider - which is delicious not English cider which seems to aspire to the condition of vinegar without being honest enough to say so.
Then we did advanced schlepping - i.e. wandered around Margate, calling at various favoured locations : Qing to see Anne-Marie and coo over the furniture (Sam), then to 7th Magpie to find Roxanne, the market organiser, then back to the British Heart Foundation shop to see if they had any Eames furniture - they didn't, but they did have a mahogany octagonal sewing table - which they were not selling in the shop, but putting on E-bay. A rare item. I bought a very nice Utility style trolley for £20 - this I left there for subsequent collection. It is Mark's wedding anniversary present - for him to do his Airfix kits on.
I know I shouldn't feel vaguely humiliated by a husband who does Airfix kits but....
Then back to the Old Town - a vital cup of tea while we dawdled and waited for Janet - we chatted with her, suggested we might carry out various tasks for her... and she seemed interested. She's expanding the Pie Factory so there may be opportunities. Then drifted to Droit House, up the hill to the car, and home.
I don't know if it was the dawdling around (quite a bit of walking today by my standards - Sam would laugh if she read that) but I was catatonic when I came home and had to go for a lie-down.
Now I have a few tasks for the rest of the week: sort out the new bank accounts, deal with the tax office, arrange everything necessary for the market stall - yes, I am going to do it, even though I have a certain reluctance. Shall I do croissants? I will have to spend a fortune on Butter - must go to Aldi tomorrow.
Then we attempted to schmooze the owner of the Lifeboat who of course used to be head of Retail Marketing at BP. But we got some work from him, because halfway through the conversation it occurred that we didn't have to stick to marketing - we could take on any projects that small businesses didn't have time for. So we said this vaguely, and he said he was looking for a property because he wanted to expand and if we could find him one.... so we have a job!
We then had lunch - nice little guinea fowl pie - but their food is regrettably veg-free so not very suitable for me. I also drank some medium cider and it was still disgusting. I fear I only like sweet cider, that is so babyish, and what I really like is Norman/Breton cider - which is delicious not English cider which seems to aspire to the condition of vinegar without being honest enough to say so.
Then we did advanced schlepping - i.e. wandered around Margate, calling at various favoured locations : Qing to see Anne-Marie and coo over the furniture (Sam), then to 7th Magpie to find Roxanne, the market organiser, then back to the British Heart Foundation shop to see if they had any Eames furniture - they didn't, but they did have a mahogany octagonal sewing table - which they were not selling in the shop, but putting on E-bay. A rare item. I bought a very nice Utility style trolley for £20 - this I left there for subsequent collection. It is Mark's wedding anniversary present - for him to do his Airfix kits on.
I know I shouldn't feel vaguely humiliated by a husband who does Airfix kits but....
Then back to the Old Town - a vital cup of tea while we dawdled and waited for Janet - we chatted with her, suggested we might carry out various tasks for her... and she seemed interested. She's expanding the Pie Factory so there may be opportunities. Then drifted to Droit House, up the hill to the car, and home.
I don't know if it was the dawdling around (quite a bit of walking today by my standards - Sam would laugh if she read that) but I was catatonic when I came home and had to go for a lie-down.
Now I have a few tasks for the rest of the week: sort out the new bank accounts, deal with the tax office, arrange everything necessary for the market stall - yes, I am going to do it, even though I have a certain reluctance. Shall I do croissants? I will have to spend a fortune on Butter - must go to Aldi tomorrow.
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