6th March 2011
After I had written the inconsequential twitter below, it occurred to me that my opening paragraphs should be a bit more momentous: something in the way of a manifesto.
I wish to remain anonymous so that I can write about exactly what I like without anyone giving me odd looks at parties. I will be writing about the personal, the political, the literary, the dietary, food, teenagers, gardening, the menopause, the temporal and the spiritual, writing and reading, PR and marketing, archaeology and probably about the course of true love - an ancient one that still gets to me occasionally. And MORE - because I am a person of broad (and arguably shallow) interests who is struggling to connect knowledge into a giant understanding of life.... that sounds like Mr Casaubon... but I am tussling with my need to make sense of things - fortunately I have a grounding of faith to help, but quite honestly that raises far more questions than answers....NOW READ ON
I am not schmoozing or schlepping today... this is a relief. I like doing that, but at the moment the lack of income from it is distressing, and the grey skies are encouraging thoughts along the lines of "suppose no one ever employs us!" Of course this is nonsense on stilts. I should not be worrying about M's income stream - but concentrating on how I can add to it.
The usual thought comes that I must send off my novel again... and that I already have the letter and synopsis written - so what's stopping me?
Enough with the self-criticism already. Yesterday I finally packaged 2 Christmas presents and paid some bills.... I'm seriously beginning to get on top of things.
I slept badly last night - due to too much wine perhaps, not a great deal, but one has to have something to help get one through a quiz. I find these things very annoying - I have great lacunae of knowledge and obviously need other people to answer useful questions about football etc., but I am mad when we have to fight people for the right answer - and I usually give up and then later they have to admit we were right.
There was something funny about the scoring. I don't think our last round score was added... weird, we probably should have won, but I'm not complaining.
Went to the new charity book shop in M- yesterday... bought an Italian vegetarian book... M&C coming to lunch on Friday. It will be the first time I've seen him for ?18 years, and much longer since I've seen C. Still, we keep in touch thanks to the glories of Facebook.
I might perhaps wonder why I am closer to the men who lived in the commune? I am only in touch with one of the women, M. I don't suppose it's anything sinister. Women go off and start families and live in other parts of the country and don't keep in touch - no, surely that's not right. I think I will have to go for the theory that the men liked me more than the women did (M excepted). It is odd. I have lots of non-commune related women friends who go back a long way - even to university: Ruth, Jane, er... others....
Quite amazing where one's thoughts take one. Just saw a pic on FB of me sitting looking very jowelly at the computer in the dining room and typing... I cannot find a nice photo of me - largely because I don't actually look very nice these days... a diet and a facelift might help, but is it worth it? I am even trying to do the Paul McKenna thing - the idea is great but it demands powers of mindfulness I am not really capable of. How can you sit there enjoying every mouthful? When people are arguing, when you are listening to the radio? Of course the ideal situation in which one just enjoyed food must exist, but not in this domain.
Is it too soon to talk about love? I think so, I should be concentrating on sending my novel to another agent, not wittering away to the ether. So that's today's task... it's still the new moon (roughly) so a good time to do it.
(I forgot to mention the astrology).
I am not thinking my blog of genius will be published. Because the blogs that get published usually focus on one particular area, and mine will inevitably be a scattergun of idiosyncrasy and therefore no use as a cookbook, a childcare manual or diet book!
Now I have spent about half an hour on this, which is quite enough.
After I had written the inconsequential twitter below, it occurred to me that my opening paragraphs should be a bit more momentous: something in the way of a manifesto.
I wish to remain anonymous so that I can write about exactly what I like without anyone giving me odd looks at parties. I will be writing about the personal, the political, the literary, the dietary, food, teenagers, gardening, the menopause, the temporal and the spiritual, writing and reading, PR and marketing, archaeology and probably about the course of true love - an ancient one that still gets to me occasionally. And MORE - because I am a person of broad (and arguably shallow) interests who is struggling to connect knowledge into a giant understanding of life.... that sounds like Mr Casaubon... but I am tussling with my need to make sense of things - fortunately I have a grounding of faith to help, but quite honestly that raises far more questions than answers....NOW READ ON
I am not schmoozing or schlepping today... this is a relief. I like doing that, but at the moment the lack of income from it is distressing, and the grey skies are encouraging thoughts along the lines of "suppose no one ever employs us!" Of course this is nonsense on stilts. I should not be worrying about M's income stream - but concentrating on how I can add to it.
The usual thought comes that I must send off my novel again... and that I already have the letter and synopsis written - so what's stopping me?
Enough with the self-criticism already. Yesterday I finally packaged 2 Christmas presents and paid some bills.... I'm seriously beginning to get on top of things.
I slept badly last night - due to too much wine perhaps, not a great deal, but one has to have something to help get one through a quiz. I find these things very annoying - I have great lacunae of knowledge and obviously need other people to answer useful questions about football etc., but I am mad when we have to fight people for the right answer - and I usually give up and then later they have to admit we were right.
There was something funny about the scoring. I don't think our last round score was added... weird, we probably should have won, but I'm not complaining.
Went to the new charity book shop in M- yesterday... bought an Italian vegetarian book... M&C coming to lunch on Friday. It will be the first time I've seen him for ?18 years, and much longer since I've seen C. Still, we keep in touch thanks to the glories of Facebook.
I might perhaps wonder why I am closer to the men who lived in the commune? I am only in touch with one of the women, M. I don't suppose it's anything sinister. Women go off and start families and live in other parts of the country and don't keep in touch - no, surely that's not right. I think I will have to go for the theory that the men liked me more than the women did (M excepted). It is odd. I have lots of non-commune related women friends who go back a long way - even to university: Ruth, Jane, er... others....
Quite amazing where one's thoughts take one. Just saw a pic on FB of me sitting looking very jowelly at the computer in the dining room and typing... I cannot find a nice photo of me - largely because I don't actually look very nice these days... a diet and a facelift might help, but is it worth it? I am even trying to do the Paul McKenna thing - the idea is great but it demands powers of mindfulness I am not really capable of. How can you sit there enjoying every mouthful? When people are arguing, when you are listening to the radio? Of course the ideal situation in which one just enjoyed food must exist, but not in this domain.
Is it too soon to talk about love? I think so, I should be concentrating on sending my novel to another agent, not wittering away to the ether. So that's today's task... it's still the new moon (roughly) so a good time to do it.
(I forgot to mention the astrology).
I am not thinking my blog of genius will be published. Because the blogs that get published usually focus on one particular area, and mine will inevitably be a scattergun of idiosyncrasy and therefore no use as a cookbook, a childcare manual or diet book!
Now I have spent about half an hour on this, which is quite enough.
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