I am always dieting and now I'm fed up with it - but I still have to do it, because I have the horrible example of my mother to consider. I realise I am more at risk of stroke/heart disease/diabetes etc. if I don't lose weight. On the other hand, I am fairly healthy, although not at all fit. I have lowish cholesterol, ok blood sugar, and v. good heart function and good levels of good cholesterol. Against that I should set all the "creaking gate" joint pains (what the hell is going on with my knee?).
For the last year or so M has been urging me to have some surgical intervention (gastric band type thing). I love the idea of using a lot of weight, but can't stand the idea of telling myself that I really haven't got the grinta to lose the weight myself. It seems wrong that the only way you can lose weight is to cede your autonomy to a process/the medical care. However, last autumn I told myself that if I hadn't lost a "substantial" amount of weight by June that I would inquire into baryatric surgery... perhaps the balloon thing wouldn't be so bad. M has had the implications of the gastric band explained to him and has become less keen on it. Personally the thought of all the health issues and discomforts and implications are not making it any more attractive: " 'Tis flying in the face of nature!"
Somehow I have to get back to the place I was in spring 2009 when I was losing weight and doing exercise and feeling really happy. Writing helps, I am not distracted by the kitchen. I get quite bored with food.
The trouble is that I have been on a low carb regime on and off since about 2009 - I had a "holiday" from it in summer 2010 and never got back on top of it again. Must never take a holiday again - maybe the odd dish of pasta (it was pasta with fresh sardines etc. that did it!).
Anyway, having dieted in a vague way since Christmas, losing 5 kg and putting most of them on again, I have decided the only way to go is extreme - that way you know you can't have anything... so I have gone on to the original Dr. Atkins diet - which I first did in 1977! It is just protein and water - and nothing else. I am only going to do it for 2 weeks, to give myself a kick start. The only good news is that when I finally weighed myself, I find I am at the bottom of the range - so only about what I was in 2009 when I started the diet. With any luck two weeks of this should shift 4-5 kg and I will feel better, and perhaps try the odd walk. The great thing about the extreme diet is that having 5-6 green beans is actually cheating - so you wouldn't dare have cake... although I did have a small piece of the latest loaf yesterday - because I wanted to try it, it looked so good. I think dieting would be easier if I didn't make bread and cakes - I can resist the commercial versions of these so easily, but home made cake is almost impossible...
The other thing in 2009 was that Mark was "dieting" because he'd just found out about his blood sugar (I think?) and so it was easier for me to cut stuff out. Now that his blood sugar is back to normal, he is eating fairly normally, including puddings etc. He still calls himself "diabetic" - but technically he isn't. Meanwhile Finn is getting stouter again - and wanting to diet - but he is a carbs addict, it will be hard for him. And he doesn't like that many veggies.
Losing weight makes me feel happy - I should do it more often! But eating really delicious food (like freshly baked bread!) also makes me feel happy - no matter what thin people say about dieting, it is more difficult and complex than eating less and moving around more.
For the last year or so M has been urging me to have some surgical intervention (gastric band type thing). I love the idea of using a lot of weight, but can't stand the idea of telling myself that I really haven't got the grinta to lose the weight myself. It seems wrong that the only way you can lose weight is to cede your autonomy to a process/the medical care. However, last autumn I told myself that if I hadn't lost a "substantial" amount of weight by June that I would inquire into baryatric surgery... perhaps the balloon thing wouldn't be so bad. M has had the implications of the gastric band explained to him and has become less keen on it. Personally the thought of all the health issues and discomforts and implications are not making it any more attractive: " 'Tis flying in the face of nature!"
Somehow I have to get back to the place I was in spring 2009 when I was losing weight and doing exercise and feeling really happy. Writing helps, I am not distracted by the kitchen. I get quite bored with food.
The trouble is that I have been on a low carb regime on and off since about 2009 - I had a "holiday" from it in summer 2010 and never got back on top of it again. Must never take a holiday again - maybe the odd dish of pasta (it was pasta with fresh sardines etc. that did it!).
Anyway, having dieted in a vague way since Christmas, losing 5 kg and putting most of them on again, I have decided the only way to go is extreme - that way you know you can't have anything... so I have gone on to the original Dr. Atkins diet - which I first did in 1977! It is just protein and water - and nothing else. I am only going to do it for 2 weeks, to give myself a kick start. The only good news is that when I finally weighed myself, I find I am at the bottom of the range - so only about what I was in 2009 when I started the diet. With any luck two weeks of this should shift 4-5 kg and I will feel better, and perhaps try the odd walk. The great thing about the extreme diet is that having 5-6 green beans is actually cheating - so you wouldn't dare have cake... although I did have a small piece of the latest loaf yesterday - because I wanted to try it, it looked so good. I think dieting would be easier if I didn't make bread and cakes - I can resist the commercial versions of these so easily, but home made cake is almost impossible...
The other thing in 2009 was that Mark was "dieting" because he'd just found out about his blood sugar (I think?) and so it was easier for me to cut stuff out. Now that his blood sugar is back to normal, he is eating fairly normally, including puddings etc. He still calls himself "diabetic" - but technically he isn't. Meanwhile Finn is getting stouter again - and wanting to diet - but he is a carbs addict, it will be hard for him. And he doesn't like that many veggies.
Losing weight makes me feel happy - I should do it more often! But eating really delicious food (like freshly baked bread!) also makes me feel happy - no matter what thin people say about dieting, it is more difficult and complex than eating less and moving around more.
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