So, on the one hand, I am on the verge of being offered a publishing deal, and getting an agent on the case, and on the other hand our card is being rejected at the supermarket because we have run out of money again. Part of me is utterly convinced that I am on the verge of a breakthrough of some sort - and the other half of me is living in poverty and misery. If we hadn't had paying guests this month I don't know how we would have managed. Our client hasn't paid on time... and the building society has rung us to complain about lack of funds. If we didn't have £100 in cash from the weekend, we would be really in the fecal matter.
It reminds me of when I was a freelance financial journalist: I would have lunch or maybe just drinks at the Savoy on some corporate jolly - and then home to scrambled eggs... all I could afford. Boy did I get sick of chicken in those days. Life is strange, I am still pushing quite hard at the square wheel - but am constantly being distracted - we need to finish Clive & Naomi's garden and get that money, and I need to do some more work for my father (and get some money from him, although I don't think he should pay me) but I am desperate to finish Conscience vol. 1. I spent this morning doing 2,000 words in about 3 hours, but loads of that time was spent doing picture research on Google to find nude male statues they might have seen together. I knew the ending was going to be hard work. And it is. Not hard, but careful, concentrated work, that needs a lot of attention to get it right. And all the time, my time for doing it is being eaten away. I really want to finish before the end of November - because once Christmas gets near it all becomes impossible.
The good news is - two bits of new work have come in today! Wonderful! So money will flow eventually...
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